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Breaking!
"As I got better at breaking, I did it more because I wanted to and less because of what I wanted others to see in me."
By Susana Vuong
Youth Radio's Susana Vuong never got the respect she wanted in school...until she started dancing. To get more positive attention, she started to practice breaking, a hip-hop tradition that blends rhythmic movement and martial arts. But as Susana improved her skills, she found she wanted to practice break-dancing more for herself than for her peers. She reflects on what break-dance has given her personally, and how she uses it as a strengthening tool. (January 6 on KPFA)
For most of my middle and high school, the way that people viewed me was based on my grades. I didn’t always get straight A’s, and I would sleep through class occasionally. But my classmates’ perspective on me began to change when I started break-dancing, and showed people just what I was capable of.
People used to call me stupid all the time, and so I’m not that big on talking. Break-dancing is a way I express how I feel without using words. I first got into breaking or b-boying on the streets when I watched a break battle to raise money for a health club. The headspins and flips those breakers were doing was amazing. I remember my group of “friends” talking about how great it would be if they could do what those dancers did. The way I was treated at school, I wanted to get some of that attention.
I decided to give the break-dancing program at my school a shot for a bit of glory. It seemed hard, but once I tried it, I was surprised to find that my arms were strong enough to support moves like the turtle, where you lean your body weight on your triceps. I learned to do an L-kick, which is basically a half cartwheel, and a butterfly twist, which is a sidekick in the air.
As I got better at breaking, I did it more because I wanted to and less because of what I wanted others to see in me. Depending on what mood I’m in, I can put on different types of music and just break it. OK, I probably would be lying if I said I didn’t care what others thought at all, because when I break in front of a crowd, the applause that I get really makes the difference in my next performance.
“How did I do? What’s a power move that everyone reacted to in a positive way?” Those questions usually race through my head before I break. But, when I’m actually dancing, my moves have nothing to do with what the crowd wants to see. It’s about what I feel like doing, or what I think would be a good follow-up move.
Break-dancing made me independent, and helped me learn that it’s what I think about myself that really matters.
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