" I needed some straight answers and politicians have certain ways of beating around the bush."
By Detective Jordan Monroe
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It was a tough case to crack, and Youth Radio’s Detective Jordan Monroe was the best man for the job. He was sent on a mission to learn more about the presidential candidates’ views on climate change. Like a good gumshoes, he followed the (green) trail to a forum organized by the League of Conservation Voters last month in Los Angeles. He files this report.
It was a late fall evening in Los Angeles when I got a phone call from Clare (Robbins), a wide smiled dame with peepers like the sun. She told me she needed a case solved and said I was the only one who she could go to, the only one she could trust.
She needed to know why only three candidates were scheduled to show up at an upcoming Presidential forum on green energy and global warming in Los Angeles. Oh yeah, and she also wanted to know the plans of those who did decide to show and what she could do to help prevent global warming. I never have been one to turn down a damsel in distress.
This was going to be a hard case to crack. I needed some straight answers and politicians have certain ways of beating around the bush. In situations like these you need to know who to talk to, and I new just the man, Steve Curwood. Steve was a standup guy. With years of journalistic experience he knew exactly what questions to ask.
Besides, he was hosting this little get together so I knew he had the digs. But I must not have been the only one curious about the missing candidates because before I had the chance to ask Curwood, he started singing like a mockingbird.
CURWOOD (on tape)
“I would like to say that we invited all of the Presidential candidates to come to our forum today, and we are pleased that we have three. Um, be great to have more, and I think as time goes on we’ll se more, because you and the other citizens around the country who understand how serious this is are going to demand it, right?”
Well that answers the first question. The other candidates didn’t show simply because they didn’t want to. Whatever the reason, I still had a job to do and questions to be answered.
Before I got any answers from the Presidential candidates, the honorable Mayor of Los Angeles, Antonio Villaraigosa had something to say.
VILLARAIGOSA (on tape)
“Last month, the Bush Administration was caught red handed again, suppressing the science of global warming. A White House editor redacted the testimony of the director of The Centers for Disease Control addressing the health affects of Climate change. Left on that White House cutting room floor were six pages of findings on the diseases and the maladies likely to thrive on a warming Earth.”
JORDAN
Bush! That diabolical fiend. So that explains why I couldn’t solve last months case. The case of…diseases and maladies likely to thrive on a warming Earth.
By now I was getting antsy, it was getting cold and there wasn’t a cup of joe in sight. I was beginning to wonder if we had all been duped into believing some candidates actually cared about green energy and global warming. And that’s when I spotted him, (Dennis) Kuscinich. A very clean and charismatic type his first statement let me know he was the real deal.
KUCINICH (on tape)
“It’s great to be at a Presidential Forum that’s not sponsored by the coal industry. I just want to say that from the beginning. As the last one was.”
JORDAN
He knew how to move a crowd. But what was he going to do about Americas’ energy dilemma?
KUCINICH (on tape)
“What I call the ‘Works Green Administration’. It’s infusing environmental consciousness into every aspect of government and all aspect of our social, economic and political affairs in this country and here’s how it will work. It begins with, the intention of having every department of federal government be involved in sustainability and in green consciousness."
JORDAN
I admit he had spunk, but what about the execution? I thought this is where the meticulous nature of a woman might have the upper hand. That’s when SHE walked in, Hilary… AKA Senator Clinton.
CLINTON (on tape)
"I have three major goals; first, to reduce greenhouse gas emissions 80% from the 1990 levels by 2050, second, to cut foreign oil imports by 2/3’s by 2030, and third, to move from a carbon based economy to an efficient green economy by unleashing a wave of innovation in clean energy and energy efficiency."
JORDAN
They say you shouldn’t count your chickens before the eggs have hatched. Well Mrs. Clinton had them tallied, packaged and ready to ship. There’s nothing wrong with confidence, but this lady was getting down right cocky.
I was starting to think humility in public service was a thing of the past. But I learned something that night, and John Edwards was the teacher.
EDWARDS (on tape)
You know I’m not here to tell the people who know very well that global warming is a crisis you already know that. Why does America not attack global warming in the way that we need to? We know why we haven’t, oil companies, power companies, gas companies and their lobbyist in Washington D.C....this has happened in America before. We don’t have to stand quietly by and let this narrow, well financed group of interests run your government, we don’t. We can actually go out and reclaim this democracy."
JORDAN
It was refreshing to hear a candidate admit that there is corruption in government. But he’s talking about taking down some of the head honchos. Hmm, he’s got matzi and plenty of it. Was it all talk, or does he really plan on going to war with the families’?
Well, I got all the information I came for. But I couldn’t help to feel a little disappointed. I hadn’t completely solved the case. All of the candidates who showed said all the right things, made all the right moves, but I wasn’t sure how to stop global warming.
What was I to tell Clare, the wide smiled dame with eyes like the sun? If any change was to take place, it had to start from the bottom, with average Joe’s like me. Hahaha, well what do ya know, perhaps that was the answer all along. Case of Changing Climates and the Candidates That Cared, solved.
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