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Living With My Grandmother
"My future was decided in a courtroom, where a judge asked me to choose between my grandmother and my dad."
By Leslye Salinas, 16
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Not everyone is fortunate enough to live with their entire family. Youth Radio’s Leslye Salinas has lived with her grandmother since the age of 12. However, the 16-year-old says it was very difficult and stressful deciding her future in a court of law.
I have lived alone with my grandmother since my mom passed away when I was 12. My future was decided in a courtroom, where a judge asked me to choose between my grandmother and my dad. Choosing my father meant starting a new life in New Jersey, where I had no family, no friends….only him. I didn’t know my father well. I only lived with him when I was a baby, before my parents separated. Choosing my grandmother meant a more familiar life…She had been living with me and mom from the time I was seven.
At that moment everyone wanted to take care of me. It was difficult to think of my father’s feelings. He thought since he was my father, I belonged with him.
I ended up choosing my grandmother because it would change my life the least.
It was a really painful decision for a lot of reasons. It’s difficult not spending much time with my brothers who live with my father…and it’s hard only seeing them and my father once in a while.
But I have never regretted my choice, and most of the time I enjoy living with my grandmother. Of course, every week is a struggle because of the generational differences. She doesn’t like my cell phone, and complains that it’s always ringing. She’s always telling me what to wear so I won’t get sick. She wants me to wear puff jackets, and flats with socks on; she doesn’t understand that teenagers don’t dress like that.
My grandmother has the wisdom of age and can offer advice, but there are times when it’s better to learn from your own experience. When I do things on my own, I often end up making the right decisions. But I know I have to give credit to my grandmother because her support is part of what gets me there. At the end of the day, she is the person I can always count on. Something inside me must have known that at even 12 years old when I decided to live with my grandmother and not my father.
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