Don't Ask, Do Tell: The Shocking Story of a Gay Sailor (VIDEO)

photo: Courtesy of Joseph Christopher Rocha/All Rights Reserved
By Rachel Krantz
August 12, 2009 at 09:44am
(download mp3)

We met Joseph Rocha at an anti-Prop 8 rally in San Francisco back in May. Little did we know at the time that his story would prove to be so compelling. This week we asked Joseph to share his story with the audience of KQED-FM, and he produced the following Perspective.

By: Joseph Christopher Rocha

After a rough childhood, I dedicated my life to public service, starting in the military. I had no idea at that time that every one of my major military accomplishments, including acceptance to the U.S. Naval Academy, would be overshadowed by my sexuality.

I earned a spot among the elite, high-testosterone community of Military Explosive Detection Handlers. While stationed in the Middle East, the men in my unit spent lots of time with prostitutes. Soon, my refusal to partake was reason enough for my peers to accuse me, day in and out, of being gay.

My Navy peers often harassed me, insisting the extra training I did with Marines was a search for sex partners. Once, I was hog tied to a chair, rolled across the base, and left in a dog kennel with feces. I was forced to simulate sex acts, on camera, to armed service members with trained attack dogs in the room. Men with hoses sprayed me down in full uniform.

Thousands of miles away from the United States, being subjected to extreme humiliation by my own military leadership, I did not feel hatred. I felt fear. Fear they would hurt me and no one back home would ever know. I had no gay friends to talk with and no gay personal life. I was only 18 years old, and I was afraid if I told anyone, I would be kicked out for being gay.


Joseph tells his story to reporter Rachel Krantz.

Eventually, someone a rank above me reported it, and there was an investigation that found dehumanizing pranks against me were habitual. I was preparing to testify, when I got a call from a Navy attorney telling me the case was dropped.

So all I have to show for my abuse is a two inch packet of investigation findings and post traumatic stress disorder.

Since 1993, the policy that reads "Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Don't Harass, Don't Pursue" (DADT) has legitimized discrimination and abuse against our Country's finest. It's a policy that made it easier for my abusers to torment me. I support House bill H.R.1283 which would replace DADT with a non-discrimination policy, and when it comes to a vote, our President and legislators in Congress should have little fear of opposing it. Because according to a 2008 Washington Post/ABC News poll, 75 percent of Americans favor allowing openly gay people to serve in the military.

I wish I could still be serving in our military, but after three and a half years in the Navy, including two and a half years stationed in the Middle East, I resigned because I refused to be punished any longer for who I am. My official statement to the Navy reads in part:

"I am homosexual. I am proud of my service and had hoped that I'd be able to serve the Navy and country for my entire career. However, the principles of honor, courage and commitment mean that I must be honest with myself, courageous in my beliefs and committed to my course of action. I understand this statement will be used to end my naval career."

I told, and I was discharged.


 

 

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Comments

Seriously poster is lame and ignorant

Obviously whoever wrote the comment calling Rocha's story into question has never been in the military. I have, and the stories he says are true. If you are overseas and in a male-only unit like I was the pressure to sleep w/ prostitutes is immense. If you hesitate in any way you are instantly tagged as gay. The only WEAK ones here are the idiots who did the hazing (much of which is ILLEGAL). The problem here is giving excuses so that our soldiers can act like animals - well that won't fly in the civilian world and has no place in the best military in the world. These are adults, not a jr. high school gym and as such these PUNKS should be disciplined accordingly.

Seriously?

I can't believe any of your story. You sound like you were such a victim. You never once stood up for yourself. Were the guys who hazed you wrong? Of course, but for you to be weak and not stand up for yourself to them and then get out, away from anyone who could dispute your story and start crying "victim" is both disingenuous and weak. Please tell me you aren't serious about "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder." That Mr. Rocha, is disrespectful to the Women and Men who have seen their friends blown up or killed in front of them, or who have been wounded, or have seen the horrors of War first hand. Because you were weak and didn't stand up for yourself, you claim that you have PTSD. Is there, in your heart, truly a comparison? There are plenty of cases where people, who try to protect themselves and are still wronged, need this type of attention. Unfortunately with your story and dramatic claims, you discredit the valid cases of discrimination. Seriously Mr. Rocha. Think about what you are saying.

Yes, Seriously (Response to previous post)

Clearly it is hard for you to understand Mr. Rocha's situation and forget some important facts. His age; he was a gay teenager with, as he mentioned, a rough background. Secondly, homosexuality is still not widely accepted, and it is pretty safe to say that the Military has little to zero tolerance. The military is harsh, especially if you're seen as "queer." Why do you feel the need to judge what situations are appropriate for PTSD?? Are you a qualified professional? Every individual is different, and war is enough to cause varying levels of PTSD, doesn't take a genius to put yourself in their shoes and figure this out. Now, add harassment from superiors and peers. The military its is own world and when you're in it and have no one else around for support, what are you gonna do? Shoot them? Harass them back? Perhaps what Mr. Rocha had in mind was to endure it and hope better days will come. Except it didn't, and once he couldn't take it anymore he wrote a letter to his superior which caused his immediate dismissal (I'm sorry, but was his letter to weak for you? Not manly enough?). When you say, "You never once stood up for yourself," how do YOU know this? And how would YOU have stood up for yourself if YOU were a HOMOSEXUAL and were being harassed and humiliated. Sounds like you have issues with the word "weak." Hmmm, I wonder if you're one of those who "toughens up" even though they REALLY want to CRY.

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