The preliminary hearing for former BART police officer Johannes Mesherle has been going on for almost two weeks now. Through these past weeks, the testimonies of BART police officers, witnesses for the prosecution and for the defense have all been heard. To this day, five months later, I still don’t know how to gauge my feelings about this case. I feel angry as an African-American male knowing the system would throw the book at me if I were to shoot a man (whether accident or not), but also sorrow for our system in failing the people that it’s supposed to protect.

To me, the testimony of the officers who’ve come to the witness stand regarding the events of January 1^st, 2009 seems very much exaggerated. It's almost as if I’m watching a crime drama television series that includes huge cover-ups. The police say they were fearing for their lives and that the atmosphere was “almost a near-riot environment”. Yet, when we watch the videos that have surfaced on the web, you see the police standing nonchalantly. Those body mannerisms make me think that things might not have been as bad as they are letting on.

During this ongoing preliminary hearing, BART police Anthony Pirone testified that Oscar Grant had to be physically removed from the train. This is something I can believe...the relationship that I have with police myself isn't the best. A lot of the officers I've come in contact with are bullies, abusing their power over the common folks. If we react towards them in the same way we would to the average person on the street, we may see some prison time. Frustration can ensue easily. Grant supposedly began cursing at the police, but why should that matter? The police are trained to deal with hectic environments; things can be taken care of calmly. 

Hopefully this hearing leads to the trial for Mr. Mesherle. I'm still on the fence about whether he should get tried for murder or manslaughter. A conviction will only help us realize abusing our power can only go so far.