Ok, so let’s talk about “jerkin”. Jerkin is a dance/music movement that is based in L.A.. They say it started in L.A., but…it looks very much derived for the turf dance culture that has been performed by folks up north in the Bay Area for years. At first, I didn’t pay much attention to the new craze. I had heard the word jerkin, but it went in one ear and out the other -- kind of like everything else I see and hear that deals with lyrically retarded music.

This changed as I was listening to 106 KMEL, the only major urban radio station in the Bay Area. A song that was obviously recorded in a messy teen bedroom while playing Madden, called “You’re a Jerk”, was mixed into the middle of the Chop Shop. The poor quality made it stick out like herpes on a friend's lip, but I couldn’t help but think to myself, this is kind of slap. I could see myself grinding with a beautiful girl to this in a overly packed 18-and-over club.

I was in denial at first, kind of like I was when Soulja Boy first showed up on the scene talking about rubber band necklaces and Bathing Apes (which were far past being played out at the time). How could this horrible, but wonderful-sounding, bull-poop music make it the radio? Well, the answer is that even though this is the first time I had heard “Your a Jerk”; the kids in LA had already been “jerkin” to it for who knows how long. Not only that, there were already about a thousand songs just like it that said “jerk, jerkin, or jerky” in the chorus. Obviously, not original, but hey, who is these days?

So basically, to be a jerk, you need to have these qualities:
1) You have to wear skin tight, colorful jeans. This style is real eighties, but these kids most likely are just copying Lil’ Wayne. Not to mention the Diligentz had this look on lock back in 2006.
2) You have to use Bay Area style beats from the Hyphy music movement.
3) You have to say “Jerk” in every song.
4) Little tiny shirts and purposely not matching always help.

Now, I support anybody making a living in a positive way -- really, more power to you. Whether or not I like how you look shouldn’t really matter to you, because you’re just being you, right? Of course the imitators follow, and sooner or later this will all die out like a great-grandma that smokes too much, but until then, make the most of it. You can only say jerk so many times before you become one.

Here’s the brand new, re-done, high-quality version of the New Boys, “You’re a Jerk”.

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