"My hair’s natural texture has been treated like the delinquent cousin that everyone knows is there, but never speaks about."
By Natalia Brown
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to this Commentary!
When Youth Radio's Natalia Brown read that straightening her hair as a Black woman was an act of white supremacy, she was defensive. That idea was in the book "Teaching Community" by theorist bell hooks. Natalia had straightened her hair since she was a little girl, and had never really thought twice about it. Now she’s twenty, and she’s decided to change her relationship with her hair and go natural. (January 6 on KPCC)
ROSARIO (on tape)
This is real. And you don’t even know who you are until you become the real you.
NATALIA
I’m here in the salon on the day of my big chop. This is Rosario Schooler, the woman will chop off my hair, and the owner of Oh My Nappy Hair. She’s excited I’ve decided to go natural.
ROSARIO (on tape)
A lot of people never come to that point until it’s way late or whatever because they still are conscious about how they’re going to be perceived you know? And so they’re like, “Oh well I can’t do that.” Well, why can’t you do that? That’s you! It’s really you, so that’s what we really need to do is bring people back to who am I?
NATALIA
Throughout my entire life, my hair’s natural texture has been treated like the delinquent cousin that everyone knows is there, but never speaks about.
Once every two weeks I would saunter into my stylist's salon and endure the pain of the scalding hot comb.
But afterward, I would feel transformed. There would be an extra bounce in my step as I left the salon just so my hair would dance in the wind.
MOM (on tape)
I straighten my hair because...ohhh, excuse me.
NATALIA
This is my mother, Thorna.
MOM (on tape)
I straighten my hair because I’ve always worn it straight. Well, not really...because when I was a little girl back in the 70’s, I used to wear an afro...but afros are totally, totally out, and I’m not going back to the 60’s and 70’s.
So for me the relaxer I love because it’s painless. It comes down to the type of texture you have. Have you seen some of those real nappy, nappy head kids in Jamaica in the street?
I’m serious, that’s how my hair is without being processed.
Natalia: But what’s so wrong with that...that;s what I'm trying to address though, ya' know?
Mom: But the thing is i can't even comb through that, it’s so hard. I can’t even comb through it!
NATALIA
Let me clarify what you just heard. I’m not laughing at the Jamaican kids. I’m laughing because I’m shocked that my mom would be so judgmental. Here’s another story about hair from my family. It’s about my aunt Janet. She’s the only woman in my family who doesn’t straighten her hair.
She finally gave in to family pressure and straightened her hair for the first time in years the day she got married. Everyone commented on how lovely she looked. At the reception party, one of the children threw my aunt Janet into the pool as a joke. When she surfaced, her hair had lost its silky straightness and had reverted to its natural texture.
“Oh my God,” the women of my family shot each other looks of embarrassment. Each was so caught up in her own feelings of shame, that she had failed to notice that the grooms’ family (who all happened to be white) didn’t even bat an eye.
MOM (on tape)
I think if you want to do it, fine. But I think you’re definitely going to regret it.
Natalia: Why?
Mom: It’s not unacceptable, but I think you have to look presentable. You have to have some sort of style to your head to be presentable in the general public. I don’t care where you are. That can bring on other issues for you, self-esteem and a sense of complex. It’s all about owning who you are. That’s one thing hair gives us.
ROSARIO (on tape)
And this is 2006, you gotta’ understand what’s really going on is the natural world.
NATALIA
As I step out of the salon after my big chop, I have the same feelings I had during my hair straightening days. I feel the sun shining on my face, and the spring in my step has made a long awaited return. But this time around there is something different.
My hair doesn’t bounce in the wind and there aren’t any strands dancing over my eyes. With each step, I am completely satisfied. But it’s a lasting satisfaction, not one that fades in a week and a half. It’s a satisfaction without shame.
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