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When Father's Stay
"Even though my dad was only 19 when he and my mother had my brother, Dad refused to let us grow up in a single parent home like the one he grew up in. He broke the chain."
By Tania Dowdy
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Youth Radio's Tania Dowdy confronts the stereotype of African-American fathers as "dead-beat" dads, and thanks her father for providing so much love and support. She says she can't imagine what it would be like to grow up with no dad, as she watches many of her friends live in single parent households headed up by women. Tania thinks growing up with an involved father not only relieved her mother's stress levels...it helped make her a more well-rounded person.
Lazy, deadbeat, and jobless are only a few of the words often used to describe the increasing number of African-American men in our society who run away from their duties as fathers. While we constantly see in movies black men who have sex with women, get them pregnant, and then are nowhere to be found, that situation doesn’t always occur. Yes, there are some who leave, but why is there such a generalization when there is also so many men who stick around?
I am the product of a man who made the choice to stay with his family; my father Darryl Dowdy Sr. My dad has been there for my brother, sister, and me since we were born. Even though my dad was only 19 when he and my mother had my brother, Dad refused to let us grow up in a single parent home like the one he grew up in. He broke the chain.
My parents were in love and they got married three years later, but by no means would he have left us even if their love wasn’t that strong. Instead of my dad saying he is the lucky one for creating such great kids, I’m the fortunate one for having him mold me into a well-rounded woman, full of dreams and ambitions.
When I look around at many of my friends, who unfortunately don’t have a father in their household, I can’t fathom what my life would be like if my dad wasn’t here. Because my dad is present, there are fewer struggles for my mom, and having a male role model broadens my perspective on life. So in essence, I not only thank my dad for being here for me, but also for being a wonderful example, counter to the stereotype that African-American men abandon their families.
- This commentary was produced by VOX Newspaper in Atlanta and Youth Radio.
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