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Babyquitter
"Unlike my friends who coo and aww at little ones, I feel a sense of dread, imagining a life after graduation bound by babies."
By Lauren Silverman, 19 years old
June 7, 2007
Many college students feel pressure to declare a life-plan - and summer jobs can help with that decision. Babysitting is giving Lauren Silverman insight on her future - one she now believes will be without babies.
I recently returned home to Oakland from my first year away at college. And all the academic advising sessions I sat through made me feel as if I’m supposed to have a clear outline for my future. At least my summer babysitting jobs are helping to eliminate some future options…like children.
My best friend, Naomi, has chosen the opposite path. At nineteen years old, she’s fantasizing about finishing school and starting a family. Sometimes, she even rubs her belly and lists possible baby names.
I guess I used to be a little baby crazy too. At twelve, I volunteered to be a “mother’s helper” to be around kids more often – and I imagined having my own kids straight out of college. But after six years in the babysitting business, and countless temper tantrums, I’ve started to suffer from side effects. Unlike my friends who coo and aww at little ones, I feel a sense of dread, imagining a life after graduation bound by babies.
In the past few weeks babysitting for four different families, I’ve repeatedly been called a “poo-poo face.” I’ve been assaulted with string cheese, bitten, and spit on. There’s only so much abuse I can take. I’ve decided to walk out of the child-care business all together, and that means the entire business of babies – including plans for motherhood when I’m out of college.
The majority of my girl friends at school are planning to follow in the footsteps of my mother’s generation…going to college if possible, and then pausing their careers to have a family.
It’s not that I don’t support them. But the fact that they’re even talking about these plans so young makes me wonder…whatever happened to college being a time to live without a calendar that charts the next decade? After my first year, people already expect answers. And it’s unacceptable to say “I don’t know.” To avoid sounding aimless in yet another category, I just say “no” to becoming a mother.
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